Bar closing I am hiding in the bathroom. do you think anyone will find me?
So the hot 23 year old i went home with last night is really 17 and was here for orientation.. i feel like a pedifile...
In that case, you should probably come up to the union, orientation is in full swing, your kind of guys ;)
cunt.
this may or may not be the weed talking, but this is by far the best tasting toothpaste i've ever had
And then she said we stopped for a train and i tried crawling out the back window.. again, i dont remember this.
I wonder if u can grow weed on Framville and sell it to Mafia Wars?
you hid your keys in a box of lucky charms because drunk you was apparently going to eat them for breakfast...
mom came into my room and asked to borrow some condoms. We have gotten to the point where it's not awkward anymore.
Is it bad to get into the ocean at night? i always thought sharks hated the smell of vomit after drinking
He threw me a bud light and when I opened it he smacked it out of my hand because "Dave giveth, and Dave taketh away". WTF
Yeah kinda weird. My grandparents are here for dinner and I'm chilling on the couch close to tripping out on pain killers. My pap asked me how works going and I prettymuch drooled on myself as an answer.
Also 70% sure I have a splinter on my eyelid from last night
We're having Wednesday-night goat-night at the bar.
It's hard to explain...
i know. like I have the nerve to talk about poverty. I eat peanut butter out of the jar.
Dude come over...were drunk and I'm holding a T-shirt gun and discovered beer cans are the same size as rolled shirts.
it was awkward when he was taking off my clothes and i had to help him undo my fanny pack
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