He's not gay. He just has bad gaydar and he gaydared himself and was wrong.
if only i could text you this smell
Eating alone in the dark with one candle. This is sorta sad.
I'm not sure if what i'm hearing downstairs is sex or not, but if it is, it sounds like there's a dog involved...i'm mildly concerned.
i lost my airplane ticket and tried to board with a bar receipt in all the confusion. i have officially lost all brain cells in college.
Well the weddings in 4 days so I already got the eightball lined up and the wii fit all warmed up. Still wanna bet I wont lose 20 pounds by the wedding?
did we cross streams again? the only thing I remember is seeing a dick
but I'll probably watch some porn later so it's not a complete waste of a Saturday night.
They're showing aladdin at the bar my birthday is complete
her dad gauges his nipple piercings.
I just learned how to imitate a trains smokestack. The downside is it makes you look like you ate cocaine. The upside is YOU LOOK LIKE A TRAIN
What was the point of renting a $600 trolley if no one even remembers going to the first bar?
He just said Bill Nye is just a dude. If I ever considered sleeping with him, I never will now.
not only did I call my ex crying but drunk me also deleted the phone log so I had no warning when I saw him in class
I’m really upset they canceled the conference. Since the divorce I’ve been working out, I bought cute new outfits and even found a bikini I liked. Now it’s all online. You can’t get laid at a webinar
Randomize
