after he gave me a diploma for giving him amazing head, getting a regular diploma isnt all that cool.
All he said was "Yeah, there's a lot of air down there. And penis."
The only bad thing about this relationship... my forearm strength is dwindling
I forgot to tell you thank you for putting me out when I was on fire. im sure I'll laught about this someday...
the beer staff turned into a beer spear way to quickly
On a scale of one to america, how free are you this weekend?
Is my lip ring still in your hair?
Too much alcohol and too many lesbians. I can officially say I have regrets now. At least that's something.
I was drunk for 3 days straight...well wasted for 3 days with periods of "just drunk" inbetween
I spent the last 6 months operating under the assumption that I HADNT fucked a paramedic. I was wrong.
You're an independent woman who is defined by her own actions and not by whether or not you have a man. You also have great tits.
Let's drink lean at the 5 seconds of summer concert. Give the teens a glimpse into their future as dysfunctional adults holding desperately onto their youth. You in?
it was an ACCIDENT
it was a DICK
dude i haven't had a solid dump since sunday and i still cant hear out of my right ear
I am NOT losing my v-card to a guy who doesn't know my ass from my elbow.
Randomize
