Just did shrooms. Don't feel shit! Wsasted 40 bucks on this! Nothing's happenig except for this little gnome on my shoulder and the couch is melting. Fuckin waste of money.
your address is 607B right?
yeah why?
i need to tell the guy bringing over the flaming bag of dog shit where to put it
You asked the dj to play 'who let the dogs out" because it was your birthday. You left the bar and then re-entered to the song
It's like you don't even want to get drunk with me everyday, anymore.
Wanna hang out, and by hang out I mean go get plan B... and maybe lunch, but mostly plan b
My goal of the day is to not shit myself. That's it. Setting the bar real low
Apparently we were arguing for captain seats so I shouted "who has your virginity." I got the seat.
This is the high leading the old right now
She told me a motorboat isn't successful unless they come out gasping for air. MISSION ACCOMPLISHED!!!
Hey douche face I just want you to know, if you ever got hit by a bus, I'd really miss you.
Only if you died obviously.
So here's my pathetic thought of the day: what does it smell like to be sober?
LESSON OF THE DAY: Saying Everclear gets you out of explaining anything.
Things are coming back to me in chunks. I vaguely remember signing a shirt that said 'I enjoy vagina'
I AM SO PROUD OF YOU
Pretty sure the guy at the Halloween party dressed as an ice cream man is working his way through the building without a care for gender or age. He high-fives me on his way out each morning.
Listen all I know is that mistakes were made and she stole the car and drove half an hour for food at 4 am
Randomize
