i think if you made a shrine it would be creepy
This guy told us that for a dollar and two cigarettes he'd let Megan stomp on his crotch. We were gonna refuse, but we figured someone had to keep him from passing his stupid genes along.
i'm so high i feel like the people i'm chatting with online can some how see that i'm naked.
happy early fathers day!!!
im not a father
about that...
I just found your credit card inside the bag of chips
Draw a picture of yourself puking and peeing on her and give it to her with a note that sys this could be your future if you be my friend
I'm so bored, I can only pretend that this truck is a spaceship for so long.
Someone's having a good night if they're getting gummi bears and Astroglide.
I hope it's the birth control, otherwise I'm dying
If you ever feel goofy just think of the fact that I just shaved the batman symbol into my pubes
No it's a real cult, with original ideas and shit like that
I just had a flashback to us shaking up Gatorade mix and then inhaling it in your kitchen because it was funny. Now I can't stop laughing in work because that is the stupidest shit.
Turns out he's just a recently divorced IT guy. Not a wizard.
It's like his penis moved in and did some interior decorating without telling me first...
I will literally have glitter in my crotch for weeks.
Randomize
