i thought i deleted your number from my phone...Wtf
YOURE GIVING A BLOW JOB TO THE BOY WHO SAYS "OH SNAP"
I drew a venn diagram at the top of my final comparing stuff i know and stuff on the test.
You kept referring to your penis as "this guy."
I have just two goals for this NYE. 1) get so drunk that every guy looks like Clive Owen 2) make out with as many Clive's as possible.
and then he started using my ass as a stressball
Unless you can cure my hangover with your penis I'm not interested.
We opted you as the sacrificial dick tonight. We need our patron cafe. Go make some moves.
I'm sorry for gagging during our first time having sex
I was drunk
Please answer
Like I'm sorry but "it'll be fine trust me" IS NOT VERY REASSURING ASSHAT. Now take off your pants.
We need a shit load of segways right now
We were having a serious discussion about Blue's Clues and I just kept thinking, 'you've seen me naked'.
But I don't wanna live with them bc I need to be able to walk around naked and sex on any surface guilt free.
Well now you know my birthday fantasy: gangbang consisting of men wearing NPR pledge t-shirts.
is it bad that there is a girl in my bed right now and the only thing i can think about is the fect that its after 3am which means i cant order jimmyjohns unitll tomorrow?
Randomize
