I know she is the girl of my dreams bc she orgasmed, rolled over and then asked if I knew that Orlando beat Cleveland.
I'm cheering for the colts this year. I basically have to since my fake says i'm from indianapolis
I love taking my adderall while im in class! As soon as I take the pill out everyone around me just stares in envy!
you were making out, puked over his shoulder and insisted everything was okay
Rolling one last joint on my Psych textbook before trading it in. I might actually cry.
bong water from a few floors above me just splashed onto my face when i was looking out the window. Happy 4/21 to me
There is a girl on the metro with no shoes and she's using a Crown Royal bag as a purse.
Bring single women, or taken women who are unhappy with their relationships, or women who are happy with their relationships but have low moral standards, or women who just like to remove clothing when drunk (relationship status is unimportant for this option)
Was I really yelling "girls night" at random chicks before stealing and drinking all their shots?
I may have tried to encourage people to play a new game I invented last night. I called it Super Quarters. Like regular quarters, only using an AA medallion.
I'd apply for another job, but "staring out windows crying" is not a hot qualification right now.
All of the hungover. I've changed not showered but can't quite make it to the booze.
WE'RE IN THE RED ZONE PLAY THRU THE PAIN
He went down on me to the national anthem being sung by Jordan sparks. It was very patriotic of him
So I think my motto should be "losing bras and dignity every weekend" but like in a really amazing way
Don't judge me. It's a Monday night and I can eat burritos in while bathing in the kitchen sink if I want to.
Randomize
