I couldn't get internet on my iPod in this hotel room for porn, so I made due with UFC.
I'm not sure what to say to that.
I was giving him a handjob and he commented that he loved my nailpolish....I'm destined to die a fag hag
Yes, that's a picture of my balls. It isn't however an answer to my question.
I'm ashamed of you 12 hours later and 200 miles away
you called me and cried until i agreed to record a rap about our lives with you
Going home with an argentinian named sulvio. Ill let you know how it goes.
I'm going to have to start playing roller derby again so I can blame my sex-related bruises on that.
We got naked and peed in the garden. Something about bonding with our new house
literally just blacked in. Im watching what to expect when your expecting, eating pretzels and peanut butter, and I have someone's underwear around my neck.
In the store looking for it now. They put the theatre/script section right next to the gay erotica section. Rude. Practical, but rude.
Her hotness level dropped from an 8 to a 2 as soon as I walked into her place. It REEKED of cat piss and there was no litter box and NO CATS.
... Okay, fine. But I don't want to be a better person tonight. I'll be a better person tomorrow.
That's right. I just LL Cool J'ed you up in this bitch. Zero fucks.
I have serious attachment issues. I just realized how long its been since ive smoked out of my bong and I feel guilty for dis owning it this week
I'm with jana at walgreens picking out penis rings.... Did you know they sell vibrators at walgreens? Wtf?
Randomize
