You should never have let annie watch you have sex with other women
This fat girl in front of me just got on the bus to go 2 blocks. Do you think she ever wonders why shes fat?
As long as they suck a good dick I don't care what fruit they have and where they have it
okay so using the row boat as a giant snow sled probably wasn't the best idea.
It's official, there's a sex tape of me floating around some high school
Stand up sex. Extremely, extremely difficult. I now know how pointe dancers feel.
tanning, a slurpee, and a cigarette. spa day college edition
Today is all about not throwing up, where the fuck are my keys and does anyone know what happened to that guy in the panda suit my roommate had sex with last night.
So I can officially say that someone has licked whipped cream off my nipples. Go senior year
We celebrated our relationship by shotgunning beers on his lawn in our underwear. I may have to marry this man...
OK, but next time I'd like to be present for our make-up sex.
HELL YEAH TIME TO KICK THE CHILDREN
Let he who has not made drunken spaghetti at 3 a.m. cast the first stone.
Um so I might have accidentally on accident maybe blew up the bottom half of your truck...
scale of one to ten how loathsome is it to save my chocolate easter bunny to use for a topping on my edibles
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