If you're really into hairy Serbian chicks, Cleveland has a lot to offer(216): We're going to cougar night, the serbian chicks are the best aged.
This girl added me on fb and has all these pics of her kissing her little brother saying i will love you forever. I'm creeped out.
maybe it's her son
thats not any better.
if you ever come into my room screaming for me to set up rockband at 4:45 am ever again i will kill you
so exactly what does one wear to an abortion clinic?
he started drinking at 9am with grey goose and pancakes. He IS my hero.
I've decided the third guy that I slept with is who I lost my virginity to...
I'm wearing cowboy boots and showing way too much cleavage to be in a place with no jaeger.
Hurry up and get here. I already announced to the bar that you were on a mission to get laid tonight. I have 3 takers.
I made a Wendy's employee say fuck this and quit because I started flipping out due to a baked potato shortage. Of course I had a good night
I just got my hands on some dry ice. How do you feel about coming home to a mystical wizard toilet?
Hot Damn Cinnamon Schnapps make me feel like the sun is punching me in the face and a bear is sleeping inside me.
And now whenever I see a documentary about dolphins, I think about sex, which is super weird
I'd rather have snapchat than feelings.
Also, your girlfriend apologized to me about yesterday. That was nice of the cunt.
I behisseth at your soul from the deepest darkest depths of the earth
Randomize
