In line at the arbys drive thru on foot. Legendary.
Pls tell me she didnt actually sign a nutsack.
I don't think he has that. His apartment was pretty much a tv and a bed. Topless girl calendar and a glass of water to put out cigarettes.
nobody is as good of a wingman as me. i make whoever im with look like mark wahlberg during his underwear model phase
A moment of silence for all our pussy whips bro's who had to endure the NEW MOON premier!
As it would turn out, "jesusssssss" is not the password to enter Faith Chapel's wifi network.
and that's why he's hiding in the taco suit
Found a guy passed out on the coffee table with a thong duct taped from ear to ear.
Tried to bribe the bartender with wedding cake. Felt bad for not giving her a tip.
So much beer in the passenger seat the seatbelt light is blinking
i didnt have any regrets until i found out he was a freshman.... and the only reason he got into yale was because of soccer... and he wasnt premed.
Maybe just the first 2 wks of Nov can be dick detox.
The day I let him eat me out will be the day that Donald trump is an honest, kind, non-bigoted member of society
Eat, nap, & pace yourself. Words to live by.
You can't go around chasing people and screaming JUST LET ME LOVE YOU. We're in a public place.
There is a dude with blue hair and a samurai sword and another dude dressed as Dead Pool. I daresay standard social conventions are not applicable in this environment.
Randomize
