I just sneezed everywhere.....everywhere. Now no one will talk to me.
i can't decided whether the fact that her nipples are bigger then her palms is a problem or not
I got rejected. By another girl. At a red light. In front of seven shirtless cyclists in the middle of the night. How is that normal?!?
Yeah.. he went to Tebow in the middle of the crosswalk and got hit by a cab... The yellow ones really don't stop
Okay, who took a picture of their pubes shaved into a dragon on my phone and made it the background?!
We need to re-create the Get Some Ass Tour 2002.
Um, 2 out of 3 people involved with that particular event are now married, so I don't think that will be happening.
HELLO, they're MARRIED! They need to get some ass more than anyone.
you riverdanced for the cops while the rest ran away.
Had mirculous sex while watching miracle. Until she got mad that I kept quoting the movie. Not my fault I'm a good multi-tasker
Do you believe in miracles?
The spark has left our relationship. i used to make slightly inflammatory jokes at you. you would retaliate in jest. look at this. look at what is happening here.
Suspicion confirmed. my mom has her nipples pierced
Way to crack the case Nancy Drew
Everyone is coupling up and I'm just excited the bartender gives me enough attention to order more shots.
I mean seriously, she can have his dick anytime and im over here salivating like a thirsty bitch.
Sorry, was sleeping. I heard a rumor that I had a hangover, so I just went with it...
That’s true love. If they recognize a chocolate mold of your anus.
my favorite part was when you kept waving @ that guy and insisiting it was your cousin..and it wasnt and wondering why he wasnt waving back lol you were legit PISSED
Randomize
