Text. Mid BJ. 8 points.
i don't plan on having that self control this summer
i can't help myself.. i am just so in love with the kitchen manager.
...he was wearing JNCO shorts.. i'm pretty sure i saw the dragon.
I had fun last night. We should have sex less often.
No mixer. Vodka in yogurt?
if i find out your the one who pierced my belly button im going to fuck your sister again
You blacked out and walked in on my neighbor breast feeding at 3am yelling "where is my best friend". I think we should go apologize.
Btw if you ever get emails that pretty much contain 'bwahhhhh jatkkvsweuo' it's safe to assume it's me.
He asked her to marry him and she said yes. There is NO WAY she knows about his penchant for wearing lingerie.
Woke up the day after the party with a bruise on my stomach. Pretty sure my liver was trying to escape for fear of it's life.
Just stuck all that extra cocaine money we made in a savings account...like a responsible adult..
I don't remember much and some girl almost convinced me to jump off the bridge while she held my stuff...
I woke up completely naked with the exception of my leg warmers. Last night must have been interesting.
Sometimes I get confused on who I really actually know and who's lives I just know everything about via internet. Its a fine line
I'm pretty sure she tried to draw a self portrait out of her vomit. Then you tried to help, but passed out in the vomit.
Randomize
