its not stalking. its research.
Billy Mays is dead, Vince Schlomi is in jail, who's going to sell me useful gadgets at ridiculously low prices now?!
By the end of the second bowl I was making sound effects to every hand movement he made.
She has no definite jawline and all of her photo's have Ke$ha quotes as captions followed by a "<3" Even by your standards that is embarrassing.
Tuesday night just isn't my ideal coke binge night.
Just found a 7-11 receipt for new years eve at 1:30 am apparently we felt the need to buy three jars of pickles and a gallon of milk does this ring any bells?
That is the best grammar in a dirty text ever. Excellent use of the semi-colon. And yes; I am hard.
i was debating whether to load antoher bowl when i realized i was holding a sandwich in one hand and a cookie in the other. and laughing.
From what I can tell at a cursory glance, it seems that last night I fell asleep on string cheese and it melted into my bra.
Is it frowned upon to bring a flask to the er?
Are you doing trivia tonite? Also sorry I peed on you.
I swear to god if you eat that last piece of pie while I'm gone I will never speak to you again. I'm so serious.
And thanks for putting me in that safety position on the bathroom floor while I was spooning the toilet
I blacked out in the cab last night... Cant remember getting in the front door, also i got into bed with my grandma.
We had an argument over whether or not she had super strength. She settled it by dragging me to the bed room and throwing me on the bed. Then forcefully fucking me. She won the argument.
Randomize
