remember them days when you seriously wanted your mom to marry rev run and we would always talk shit about justine?
joeyyyy why you always taken cheeseburgers from me?!?!?!
Fuck?...well quicky, i have to study...unless you can read my book while i bang you, then it can last four chapters
I can be that talented
Well yesterday i made out with the entire football team and rifht at this very moment our waiter looks like a ken doll. Straight up. And he gave me wine so ill probly make out with him
college has opened so many doors for you
i decided not to call her again when she started singing "goodbye my lover" as i was walking out the door..
I don't have enough holes for all these australians
A friday night jus isn't the same if the cops don't raid my dorm
my vagina has been out of service for wayy too long... this semester needs to start like right now
I woke up with my bra stapled to the ceiling, her dad was in the hallway winking at me. I was the less drunk of the bunch.
I guess crabs is what I get for sleeping with my ex.
People shouldn't leave you two alone together. You're just going to end up having sex.
I mean I'm screaming I love the gays in the middle of Bart so yeah
he pulled my tampon string out with his teeth like a grenade pin yelling frag out! That's why I fuck guys back from deployment. They'll go the distance
I'm not in it for just the sex. If I wanted mediocre dick once a week I would have stayed with one of my exes.
Either im seeing the northern lightgs, someone is having a rave, or im on acid.. Im most likely on acid
That’s the third time this month he’s hooked up with a girl by telling her it’s his bachelor party, and he’s not even dating a chick let alone engaged.
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