I have the worst wedgie. Seriously. Its horible. And there are people everywhere around me.
Slide your hand down the back of your pants and shift to the side slowly
...are you coming on to me?
guy in front of me on the bus did 12 yrs, hes teling me about how to knife fight
I walked into his room and he was naked with a half eaten pecan pie and a bottle of wine.
i'm sad. The beetle crawled away. I was only trying to get him stoned.
I hope in my next life I'm a sterile trophy wife. With a husband who showers me in wealth and gifts but can't get a hard on. Do you think my karma is good enough for that?
His idea of role playing was him wearing the halloween mitt romney mask while I gave him head
Ps I'm glad our relationship hasn't progressed into having to get married so we legally can't testify against each other
Just a heads up... Don't get high and attempt to do your own taxes
I need to start a penis folder so I stop "accidentally" showing people my junk. On a side note- St. Pattys penis was a hit, four leaf clover and all.
I don't care how hot he is. I will not strip for him to country music.
Well shit I mean if you get a bunch of cashed up drunk lesbians together in a casino, it's bound to go south at some point
Three times. Three times I left home yesterday in search for sex, and three times I returned un-orgasmed.
but dude how did I get so drunk?
Pretty sure it happened right after you poured a shot of Wild Turkey into your Budweiser, chugged it, and screamed "I. NEVER. BACK. DOWN!"
She deleted me on Facebook. I think it's safe to say that she knows I fucked him now.
I think a major source of concern would be the fact you snorted a shot. Who does that?
Randomize
