Hey theres a creepy ass guy stalking our house.i would look alive geting in 2nite.
I'm drive I can fine osifer
What I lack in compassion I make up for in lack of compassion
I think i'm just gonna start shot-gunning everything that comes in can form.
Does this sound normal?...She's ironing on pictures of her dead cat to all of her green clothes...
i just feel like it would be irresponsible for you to not have sex with me again.
My vagina agrees.
Nothing like a $37 iTunes bill. Jesus Christ do you know how many $2 beer/shot specials that is??? The answer is 16. 16 beer/shot specials.
We left around 4am, just after you laid down on your front lawn to take a piss. After 15 mins I said "dude are you still peeing?" you replied "Nope, just laying here with my dick out."
How could you give up sex for lent? I gave up religion for lent years ago and never looked back. Or give up civility, not sex.
The black hole just entered the party man, I can literally see guys starting to move towards her.
Look at my fb. It says single. That's the gospel.
well it got awkwardly quiet so i looked up, slapped his stomach, said "youre the best!" while pointing at him, and went right back to sucking his dick.
With a stable of 7 fuck buddies, I literally use a random number generator to determine the order in which I will booty call them on my way home from work. I have not slept in my own bed in a month. I just keep half my clothes hanging in my car or in a suitcase.
I accidentally mass texted his dick pic. Not only to my friends, but to my dad as well...
They already have a joint checking account. She's got his balls in her purse! What's next, a shared Facebook account?
Randomize
