i just rode the bull and i see vomit in my future.
I work with a guy that has a strong spanish accent. He just said "I have a plethora of ..." and I busted out into laughter b4 he finished his sentence b/c it reminded me of 3 amigos.
drinking colt 45 because lando calrissian told me to
it's a girl!!
That's great, I look forward to meeting her in 18 years
I just hemmed my dress for halloween, never felt more like a man
just heard 2 nerds making fun of a girl for mispronouncing stochiometry. they followed it up by discussing the mathematical equation for getting laid. my day just became 100x better.
Passed out for 3 hrs til now to wake up naked on my bed covered with grass from drunk slip and slide I would call that success
I save people's lives for a living, but I want to ruin his marriage.
My last google search was 'bulk asian wives' I don't know either
Yea idk it was like early in the morning and you were walking around with no shoes carrying a printer
Me and the cabbie are stopping on the way at a sit down restaurant to eat. My life is so sad.
Riding the train home at 6 am for class still drunk is losing its novelty in my junior year
As your friend, I promise I will drink a full bottle of vodka and belly slide down the stairs with you if that test is positive
i just watched a 27 minute video about owls...that high.
If you wear a peguin suit you MUST send me a picture!!!
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