I feel like I'm in dance class right now
problem. drunk. stepbrother hitting on me again. help.
: am i supposed to send the mass text 'merry christmas!' to my booty calls too?
Fuck. The basement bathroom I've been getting head in for 6 months just went 'Out of Service'.
Todays life lesson brought to you by last nights half pitchers of cheap sangria: you'll never get the stain or the SMELL of sangria vomit out of your bedroom carpet.
In conversation she brought up that she slept with Tucker Max on the UF football field
You made out with two different species that night
I did not get laid last night bc my condoms were too small. I'm allowed to be dreary
I'm not taking advice from anyone I've seen passed out naked at noon on the hood of a strangers car. Meaning you.
I started screaming "MY PARENTS ARE MORMON" at a stranger and promptly proceeded to run into a wall. How do you think it went?
No, dude...I agree it's great in theory but I promise you that 80 drunk 21 year old sorority girls together in one room for formal is one of the worst drama filled ideas ever. Ever.
Just sent a dick pic to ur girl. It was accident. Plz mail it to Gena.
He compared my vagina to his favorite T-shirt. I don't know if I should take that as a compliment or not..
Funny you say that, I just sold my stripper pole to my mom tonight...
I just bumped into this random I hooked up with a few years ago at Steve's party. Talk about a fingerblast from the past!
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