Maybe I lied like you did about your herpes.
I dont think problem is the right word. Problems arent something you enjoy. Life would be too boring without gambling.
Tonight we are playing Scuba-Keg. Getting keg now. I'll explain when i get home.
long story short: there's a file in the master file cabinet labeled "lube".
She pointed at me and told her friend, I'm going to fuck him, its going to be really loud, so yes, i need the whole basement.
Somewhere at this very moment, a group of drunk white girls are singing dont stop believing.
Im sitting alone watching titanic. Drunk. Without pants. Holding a fishing pole. Im pretty sure im okay with all of this.
I don't care what he thinks. My vagina has an open door policy.
My ex just called and told me that he is on his way to the hospital because he popped a vein in his dick. Should I go to the ER with him or class?
i climbed out of the bath tub this morning and found him taped to the treadmill
When I take mushrooms I can feel your presence down there. I can feel where Africa is too.
Maybe is for pussies. We only say yes in this household
Wait I'm all alone with a guy and his turtle
Remind me to talk to you about nipple clamps.
Sometimes you gotta do what you gotta do... and then you need to delete the history so you're girlfriend doesn't see it.
Randomize
