Its a bunch of hippies dancing in front of a stobe light. For ten dollars I could have gone to the strip club and at least had a lap dance
peeing is so easy when youre drunk. you just tell your body to pee and it pees.
i think 'regret' was last night's theme. i could taste it in my mouth and woke up next to it.
Apparently when he woke up I was tripping my face off. Everytime the cat meowed I would meow back. This went on for several hours.
i have a girlfriend
if you're drunk do you have a girlfriend?
no
I'm drinking whiskey outta the bottle trying to earn the trust of some ducks in the yard
I just couldn't help myself when there was a FOUNTAIN OF SHOTS
I jumped on his cock in 2 seconds flat. Thanks mom for sending me to gymnastics when I was a kid.
Due to the events of st patties day last year I created a moral and ethical policy so that I won't get kicked out of the bar again. It mostly consists of not wearing pants so then I don't take them off at the bar.. and subsequently get kicked out.
Slow dancing with the chandelier.
U have successfully fucked my brains out. I just almost put deodorant on like chapstick
I can't go to class, I have all this weed to sell
Enjoy the penises
At about 2:30 i found you passed out in my closet with your face covered in cheese whiz
I passed out while searching "symptoms of narcolepsy"...
Randomize
