You can't keep basing your relationship off of the fact that you both love ramen noodles
Handle of 100 proof captain dressed like a pilgrim here we go
so exactly what is concert sex etiquette? Before, during or after???
all of the above
You will never know an awkward moment until your parents pick you up from a one night stand.
I'm going to need a Jurassic park sized pooper scooper to deal with all this shit last night caused.
I have walked into stripper central, but I'm on the street at 1:00 in the afternoon
Is it bad that I'm a 32 year old woman that is so afraid of commitment that a hamster is too much responsibility?
Remember the thing I sent you? "Often complex problems are best solved by thinking like an animal." Hump away!
I love this text stream: discussing the development of a business model centered around cooking acid to bankroll a yacht trip in Croatia
just wanted to eat pizza off his dick so he let me and he can never forget it
The bottle brush for the bong worked really well to clean the brownies out of the waffle maker.
Is it bad I use my AA meeting to hookup with guys?
Like I'll lick your nuts to make you feel better if you don't get it
Is it just me or did we have a heart to heart talk while you were naked last night?
Basically, I am an endless fountain of unconvential sexual experiences and knowledge.
Randomize
