You did that once after drunk driving from a photo shoot
That was very cool/italian of you
Which brings me to my next point, how come italians are so well adapted to drunk driving
So you maybe wanna hang out again? I could use the $5
Whatever I can do to help stimulate the economy
I may or may not have screamed I'M ON A BOAT while having sex...on a boat. I think I was born to have sex with him.
i wish there was a 'silent except for booty calls' volume level on my phone
So dude, she and I just got done having the most amazing sex, and then she rolled over and said that "lets make some tacos" and proceeded to the kitchen... naked... I'm buying the ring tomorrow
Even the French judge on the olympics would give that a 10
it looked like a condom graveyard when i woke up. they were everywhere
the igloo is complete. bring your weed and the hat with the floppy ears
You are very nonchalant about the high probability of us having an orgy.
Eh, I'm ok with this, this can work. We're the best kind of the worst people.
you said candy land and then passed out.
ps. we found your stash in the candyland game. Thanks.
He kept checkin to make sure you were still alive after you passed out on his bed, After like the 4th time he walked back in there you were naked on his bed eating an apple, claiming he needed to be the Adam to your Eve..That drunk..
I want to pinterest what I want to do with my pubes. Why isn't there a board for that?!
I made people serenade her before talking to her and went on a condom run. If I'm going to be in the friend zone, I'm going to be its fucking king.
are you just sitting in your hotel room drinking popsicle vodka?
.....well anything sounds bad when you say it like THAT
I need all the beers. I want to be holding on to the grass so I don't fall off the earth drunk.
We watched ESPN, hooked up, got waffles. You know, a typical weekend.
Randomize
