at a party and just made O-H-I-O out of dicks and vajayjays...i hope someone took a pic i was too busy (; GO BUCKS!!!
so when we were booking the hotel and plane tickets for vegas we reserved a chapel for someone, it's inevitable.
Two girls I have never met just thumb wrestled to decide who gets to make out with me.
I wish I could go about my daily activities with his dick inside me
Just please never masturbate in my bed again. I'm burning my sheets as I write this.
I can't tell which way is up. Too many corners around his house too. An arbitary assimilation of edges.
Christ, I swear you are the high man's Dr. Seuss.
I'm cheerleading for traffic. people are staring. Why am i the only high person on the way to class?
Was I holding a cat when you saw me? Because that was the height of that party for me.
Just so were clear I meant the head your face is on
Moment of the day: as we leave the restaurant, she reaches into my pocket, pulls out her panties, and angrily marches to her car. I felt like a sketchy magician.
Fucking in bar bathrooms doesn't count as "rushing things"
This may be the alcohol talking, but I'm pretty sure I know Spanish now
We are not having sex in the fucking kindergarten
Tim is a child that you physically can't love because he makes it hard for you to even find anything redeeming about him so you debate leaving him forever at the gas station.
I do not recommend playing football on LSD like at all
Randomize
