When we talk. Remind me of these topics, photoshop, my bday, threesomes, and cherekee indians. I swear these are real topics...
New topics to add when we talk, sweden, boxing, and the band journey
careful when you do the walk of shame, they are handing out bibles on campus
Turns out you're obligated under man law to share any passwords you may have for porno sites
Is that what they're teaching u at that bar review class?
I just got hit by a car. I'm fine; I'll be to the bars in about 15
Agreed. Everyone should experience a blackout before 3pm in their lifetime.
We found you on the floor drooling you kept saying over and over how you were double jointed.
Every time you blow me I should make a paper crane and we'll make them into a chain and hang them from the ceiling. And then whenever we have people over and they ask what the cranes are for I'll say "reminders" and wink at you.
I've been drinking vodka for the last 12 hours at the beach and can't see straight and have awesome hair.
LIFE IS #1 SOMETIMES
If he thinks that that is an acceptable way to ask me out he is out his goddamn ginger mindddddd.
exhale infront of a fan. self shotgun.
So you're on like a list there now..."Do not under any circumstances give this person a knife. Serve them in plastic cups ONLY"
literally 50% of my time being 20 has involved my genitals thus far
But how MUCH of an emergency? Like, should I go to the ER now, or can it wait until after the bar crawl?
I'm saying "I told you so" now so that I don't slow down to say it on the way to grab the fire extinguisher
I'm to childless and to single to be asking myself why I'm so sticky
Randomize
