her vagina probably looks like a grenade went off in a deli
Fair warning.. porn on your laptop when you turn it on.. seemed like a wonderful idea last night.. until it died
So I just saw a commercial for tickle me Elmo furry gloves. And I thought hmm I bet I could jerk off with those. Is that a sign of deepseated charachter issues?
I wish life was like the Sims. Right when you're pregnant the music would play and I would just know instead of agonizing for the next two weeks.
I would pay so much money for a video of you fucking a sheep
Can we progress our friendship to a point where i'm at least granted a blowjob allowance?
he fucked my hip out of place.
dude you cant keep breaking into my house just to raid my fridge.. especially at 3AM.
Please delete that video of me blowing you. I will repay you with 100 blowjobs even better than the one I gave you during that video. Please. I am gonna be a grandma one day.
Look if 10 am was too early to go barrel tasting the winery would not be open.
I had to physically pry the rocks out of your hands so you wouldn't throw them at the guy with the cowboy hat. You probably would've missed anyways.
I was more obsessed with the sweat stain on her back that was simultaneously shaped like a vagina and the virgin Mary.
i convinced him to be a french maid for halloween. he has no idea what he's in for. i just ordered the breast forms.
Omg this place. I'm at a neighborhood party. My mom has kissed two other moms. Where am I
when i saw him today i think my vagina did the equivalent of a stomach growl... its been to long
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