im marching my happy ass in there and im not leaving until he cheats on his girlfriend!
maybe all of them together would equal one normal sized dick.
at a bonfire and someone threw a plastic cup in the fire. everyone immediately stopped what they were doing to yell collectively at him about what he was doing to the environment, then went back to drinking
only in oregon
Its a sad when the highlight of your day is flicking a booger and actually getting it to stick to your computer monitor.
It smells like ranch
Must be all the white people
If you fuck her, Im going to call you and I want you to cough 2 times.
Found a Safeway Deli Sandwich in the shower this morning... Perhaps the 9th beer was unnecessary.
Why would you hook up with someone whos known for peeibg in someones mouth
We dropped so many bottles they would only give us plastic cups. We actually drank ourselves back to preschool.
Other than my penis smelling like an ashtray, it went really well.
Why is my fridge empty save for a basketball???
answer my text you professional douchebag
and i mean that in the cutest, flirtiest way possible
You may have gone on a date, but I ate chicken nuggets shaped like dinosaurs for dinner tonight. I think we both know who the real winner is here.
That's a beautiful sentiment.
When are your genitals available?
The only thing I remember is the 300 pound man breaking ur railing from sliding down it at 3 am. Must of been a good night.
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