VAGINAS EVERYWHERE
they're staring at me
see you put your penis in her and it's like an ignition key to start the crazy
you googled "nude photos of celebrities you wouldn't expect to have nude photos", puked into the beer bong, and then laughed
i lnow ive slrrwsdy teted you this. but goddamn girl on tv is a good song
John stretched a condom over his face and tried to puke in it.
If after tonight I can still walk on my own, take me to another bar.
I am ina trunk. Iam in a trunnnnnjkk. I hope its yours. Oh manomanomano. Thids better be your trunk
The 12 year old son winked and made eyes at me while his father fed me vodka gummy bears. Gameday yo
I just threw up again because I opened my eyes... God is laughing. I resorted to taking the Mexican Dramamine because I feel seasick from walking. Not helping.
ARTHUR IS ON FUCKING NETFLIX THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
I told him I was on my period but he says "I'm a doctor, you think I can't handle blood?" And just went for it. Jackpot
I slept with six men with different nationalities this week. Who says I'm not a woman of culture?
when part of the plan includes getting high, i usually forget how the rest of the plan goes.
I feel like I haven't slapped your ass in years. This will be awesome.
i was watching the elves fighting on my knees while waiting for the shrooms to kick in then i realized
Randomize
