Why is it people are always in costumes on Cheaters these days? Joe Greco literally just said, "It appears they get chased by a chicken with a chainsaw." WTF?
I think I'm cybering, it's been a while and its more in depth than it was in 8Th grade.
FYI the landlord called and plumbers will be tearing up the bathroom tomorrow. Apparently the tub is leaking into the apt below us so be sure to pee in the shower today.
Like what kind of adult things? Whats more adult than drinking at 2pm on a monday?
Dude. This guy has a ketchup bottle full of jello shots. Best. Thing. Ever.
I was masturbating in my bed this morning when my ipod alarm went off and it started playing "show me the meaning of being lonely"
Someday you'll be stoned enough to create a one-person step team and then you'll understand
My fridge broke, and apparently the back is missing. The repair guy just fixed it with a pizza box. I didn't ask where the box came from, but it wasn't mine. Reason #20 why rent is cheap.
I just stood on my roof naked pouring vodka onto my garden. sweet dreams
It's cool, I power napped on the dryer while they were fucking in the bathroom so I'm good to go now. Where are you?
Fighting the urge to throw up all over my little brothers jr high basketball bench. Welcome home aaron
I was wasted and the time changed. I blame the male strippers.
I woke up this morning to my panties draped around the neck of an empty bottle of bulleit. That is the perfect visual metaphor for my life at this juncture.
He was 6'8" - I shit you not! He sat up in my bed and the ceiling fan got him right in the forehead.
I twisted my ankle while drunkenly playing in my adult kickball league. Now I'm having to use my grandpa's cane to walk at this party. I am so single.
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