yeah but I shoulda known it\'d be bad when he start rubbing my pubic bone instead of the clit! Awkkkkwarddd
i had a dream the other night i was titty fucking you while you were asleep, then you woke up and didn't care.
There are thorn wounds on my balls, don't ever question my dedication to party again
so he must've not known that your lastname is Came because everytime someone would say your name he would scream "NO SHE DIDNT" to the whole party. He must've not been too good then either.
A girl limped into my class 15 minutes late wearing sunglasses, leggings, and a kiss me im irish shirt. She sat down and took her glasses off and im pretty sure she only had one eye's makeup still on. Someone had a great st pattys day.
He went down on me and then slapped my ass saying "thanks for the confidence boost"... is this all I'm good for?
Do you not remember you showing everyone in the bathroom your period stained underwear? I'd say you were pretty happy it came
is it possible that there's a used condom holding pennies in my bra? I'm so confused on what happened last night...
I wish I was in the big bed with a naked you post sex eating chicken nuggets
I need to pack up my vagina and leave. We only do bad things together.
OH AND DAN PET MY CAT WHILE I WAS GIVING HIM HEAD
He told me that his favorite part about me is hearing my voice while we fuck. I think that was the nicest thing he has EVER said to me.
The Domino's delivery guy is in front of me at The Wendy's drive-through. Hmmm.....
Those brownies did us in. I honestly blacked out completely.
What brownies? Ohmygod.
It’s bad enough my brother slept with half of the sorority this year, but now he’s lifeguarding at the club and every divorcée and cougar in town is asking me for his number. My twin is a manwhore and I’ve become his pimp.
Randomize
