Sorry I couldn't answer your call, I'm expecting a call from Chris Hansen.
I'm guessing you didn't end up going to the bar last night.
Nope. Ended up at what I believe was a slumber party down the street.
You cheat on me once, shame on me. You cheat on me with a white girl, it's fucking over
i am one more weekend without sex away from dosing him with viagra and locking ourselves into a closet.
He came, while we were making out fully clothed. I'm going to write a book.
Apparently, Mom was less-than-happy about us shotgunning beers before we opened presents.
also, add "teaching boys to sext" to my charity work
I'm pretty sure at any given moment you could wring out my liver and get a couple of shots of jäger.
Think I just subconsciously wanted a cigarette and started sleep walking to Carl's.. Didn't realize what I was doing until I found myself in an elevator.
After we had sex he made me watch a Top Gun highlight video...
lost her for two hours. she was banging a russian guy in her car in the parking lot. he told her she was majestic.
His buddy came running in the room after we had sex, and started "sponging" the sweat off my forehead with his sport wristband.
He compared my ass to "a 13 year old track star's ass." Umm WTF? Is that supposed to be a compliment? And when I questioned boy or girl he said "either."
this periodpocalypse needs to be over. I need head
All I fucking want right now is a cheeseburger the size of my face
when some dude came up to you and said he didn't like your shirt you just looked at him and firmly asked if he really thought that you gave a fuck.
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