my vagina is like the nba. its where amazing happens.
I'd be a gr8 surrogate. I'm gonna love your fetus
No i'm not calming down the girl at white castle did not need to see the picture of my dick on your phone.
You said your legs stopped working and then pulled yourself around the floor with your hands.
That explains the wood chips stuck in my nipples.
My name in their phones is "That Girl". If i can't get it to go away, I might as well live up to it.
Well anything after a French guy would have been a disappointment. But I'm fairly certain he was just trying to masturbate into me.
I'm playing a lilo and stitch drinking game
Aloha alcoholism.
It's truly amazing how much porn I can get in while my phones at 1% battery life.
How about to stay friends we only have sex on our birthdays. Maybe national holidays too. And days we get really drunk. Wanna get really drunk?
Had the best sex Thursday night then Friday night I met his girlfriend. The worst thing is we became friends like she gave me her number.
Got home and told boyfriend what happened. He was like "you made out with a guy you call Balls Deep?" and hi-fived me.
I deserve to have sex with a hot freshman ok
Chugging this bottle of Jim at the airport is proving more difficult than I imagined. TSA is not amused.
Give me one good reason why I should go with you.
Free beer.
..pick me up at 8.
If I told the doordash driver it's national nudity day, think he'd still report me for being topless at the door?
Randomize
