Working on an important paper into the wee hours of the morning, and every time I type the word "situation," I can't help but think of effing Jersey Shore. Those guidos are now ruining my academic life.
Its 11am everyones wasted wearing sombreros and eating fresh produce..cesar chavez would be very proud
All I really need to know is how to say "where is the bathroom" and "I don't take it in the butt anymore". I think that will suffice.
There is ecstasy everywhere. Get over here right no5w. The 5 is silent.
she used teeth so i didnt tell her when i was cumming ...........dont get mad get even
If you do wifi you would be helping my penis out & real friends care about their friends penises...
A blow job from a tiger shark would still entail less risk to your genitals than having sex with her.
Like, she can be the shepard of the gays. Delivering him unto homosexuality.
I recently had a rabies scare because I thought putting socks on my hands to pick up a squirrel that got in my house was a good idea.
Clearly I'm trying to change the world one fuck at a time
you DO IT for the people
She's trying to change her flight... IM BEING COCKBLOCKED BY DELTA CUSTOMER SERVICE
so I'm walking to my last final while opening my giant red bull and i look over to my right and the guy beside me had one too and was looking back at me. without missing a beat he pulls out a bottle of jager, pours half in mine, half in his and goes "cheers"....i'm not even mad i probably failed my final
My ex-wife, who I haven't heard from since the divorce, just Amazoned me cherry flavored massage oil and a rainbow caps with the message "Happy Pride". What's the polite response?
I love you. Doing a double. Going to die. It will be painful. Let the world know i partied. God, did i party.
I don’t know what language he speaks but I know my boobs will translate just fine
I’m looking forward to few days of international relations
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