So im pretty sure the object of my emotional onterest is tired of playing with me....
This guy sitting next to me just bought a plot of land off the internet. On a whim. In the middle of class
my 3 year old cousin just woke up screaming "IT WON'T GO DOWN!'
worst night to have a conscience
The Shake Weight not only toned my arms but significantly improved my hand job form and efficiency.
I still can't figure out why that's not in the commercial.
swear to god, just saw some chick dressed in a full chicken costume buying eggs and telling the cashier that she "just wants her babies back."
buy whatever she's on. a lot of it.
had a guy just try to take his underwear off in the middle of the bar w o taking his pants off. That kind of Sunday afternoon
He played a tape of his mad rapping skills after the final...his rapper name was Mad Stylz and he rapped about all the pussy he got in the 90's. I love Sociology.
we were sitting in the bathtub when she came in with her grandpas cane adn beat us until lindsay passed out
I'm in his phone as "nashville blowjob" he also has "cleveland blowjob" "vegas blowjob" etc. i'm okay with this.
Can we skip lunch and do power hour sex time from now on? I'll let you eat nachos off my body if you really need the food.
well, at the moment I'm sleeping in someone's closet in a buzzlightyear snuggie, so I can't judge,
you went to ralph's and bought all of their pears and left them outside my house
I'm actually more excited that I had so much sex this weekend that my ovaries hurt
It actually wasn't the first time that a guy I just met ate me out in the back seat of his car in a starbucks parking lot in the middle of the day.
Randomize
