And then i made him answer questions about me before i took off my clothes
Just saw two girls doing a walk of shame together. Slut bonding at it's best.
She told me to stay away from him cause apparently he fucks anything that walks. clearly i responded with..."i walk"
You kept telling me to "raw dog" your take home breathalyzer without the mouthpiece
The biggest loser is alot easier to jack off to at the end of the season
To justify your stumbling you just kept yelling 'it's the boat, not the drinks' We hadn't even left the dock yet....
You screamed for campus security to do something about the police officer who dumping ur 40
I've crashed the car, it's a write off. The police are here and I'm dressesd as a crayon.
My leg won't stop wagging. It's like it's congratulating my vagina.
He was crying because he hiccuped every time he kissed me. We then crawled to the kitchen because neither of us could stand, and I spoon-fed him peanut butter "to cure his ailment."
Just had a 40 min argument about how many celebrity guest appearances on Sesame Street were court ordered for DUIs.
I have a kicked-out-of-multiple-bars level hangover today
it was like a shit fog rolling out of the east to encompass me and have it's way with me
I have bruises all over my legs. Did I hit a car with my bike last night?
Ahh yes. I lost my pants and swimming suit and phone charger. And I've found out who has them all even while hungover. Successful day. Nice party too.
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