His internet searches, listed chronologically: sex slave, volunteer sex slave, lava
I think vodka calistinics prior to and during beer olympics was a bad idea
He had to carry me to the car. But then sat with me and waited for me to sober up enough to have sex. He's a keeper.
Should I tell him the real reason I was in the hospital, or should I just keep him thinking the side effect he thought was in for was allergy related, not I just miscarried the child I didn't know we were having?
My attorney has my name in her roldex as need to hit that. Im gonna win my case
I think it's god's punishment for my behavior in Vegas . Lies were told. Angels were defiled. Pools were pissed in
Can we just smoke a few bowls and eat grilled cheese while drunk in our hotdog suits at 9am ?
He may not be fully over his current wife yet. But wait until I show him my tits in his office at the end of the day tonight.
All i remember his him yelling yahtzee while pouring beer down her shirt .
One of those days. Also, your pants are now in my protective custody.
Remember when we tried to have fun last time..? I got put in a choke hold and you woke up in some ones car.
I found Erin. She's getting a back massage from the coat check boy and drinking all his whiskey.
You wouldn't put pants on to see my parents.
I had a threesome last night with my fiance' and our soon to be best man. Everyone is surprisingly chill about it this morning. Is this any indication of what the wedding night will be like?
Got pulled over today for going 90 in a 40 zone with my leg out of the window. Still got out of the ticket. I'm getting way too good at this. Wanna trade bodies so we can see if it's my boobs or my charm?
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