Someone shit on the floor
she definitely has that "I'll bang you, but then I'll tell your girlfriend" look to her.
you ever wonder how lesbians feel about girls being in relationships with other girls on facebook? could it annoy them more than it annoys me?
It was ok at first, but now im getting freaked out by him jerking off to me doing yoga
Ok love is a little strong. But he consented to Nachos, beer and board game date with my cats. Keeper.
she named each of the players on the last ten madden covers in order and then shotgunned 2 beers...if she doesnt have a penis im in love
and she is using the paper towels as a pillow... but you know what? i've done that too.. so u can really tell we are sisters.
oh my god, just saw a man throw up in a trashcan and blood came out of his nose. HES GETTING ON MY BUS. HES SITTING ACROSS FROM ME. FUCK.
Hahaha I don't remember taking it away. But no one should have a sledgehammer at a party. NO ONE.
Would jacking off with Benadryl cream be good or bad for the poison oak on my dick?
His middle name is Julius so I named his penis Caesar and told him he has to say "Hail Caesar!" whenever he comes. He didn't seem to like the idea, though.
I DONT HAVE THE SOCIAL SKILLS TO EXPLAIN THAT YOU DIED EATING MY PUSSY
My feet surprised me
Where are all your bongs? Your Dad wants to make sure they're put away before his family gets here.
Umm....in my room, on my closet, under the bed and behind my laptop.
Woke up next to my vibrator and a recipe for fudge brownies. If that doesn't scream I NEED TO GET LAID, then I don't know what else could.
Randomize
