Are we in a gay sports bar?
if you made me into a cookie and threw me into a betty crocker easy bake oven on christmas morning...that's how baked i am
the bouncer kept askin you for id just to see how long it would take you to find your pants
You never realize how many sex toys you have until you have to strategically hide them while moving out of your dorm.
This girl brought half a watermelon to class. I want to be on her level.
he sounded really stupid. it was like his puke had a stutter, too.
As an added bonus, you will have a "25 blowjobs a month" voucher, expiring thirty days after the first initial bj.
I don't want anything to do with the Darth Vader stripper babe. I'm just trying to make dreams come true.
I have no idea. I think this is what happens when people take drugs in the middle of the day
"Douchebag of the Year" award goes to the guy who didn't reply to the picture of my tits.
I don't even remember what he looks like. All I know is he's 6 foot 100. I like that.
WHAT HAS MY LIFE COME TO I'M MAKING A SCARF FOR A PENIS
Drunk me has cost me a lot in cell phones...
well i maturbated this morning, which means the best part of my day has already happened.
I think it's getting serious, we started a jigsaw puzzle together.
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