i'm sleeping with myself tonight because i remember my name and i won't regret it in the morning. sorry.
I should never bitch about not getting laid. He's begging me to come over and I'm saying no because I'm watching a Golden Girls marathon.
just threw up in the bus full of other international students just outside of boulder, just keeping the aussie reputation alive
Have $25 to my name but it's $2 pitchers. I have no choice but to go.
i want to major in coloring with an emphasis on crayons.
so finals studying is going well?
Lets start the night off early. Those Coronas arent going to throw themselves up.
and my attempt at hiding my drunkness from my parents included walking into the wall as soon as they let me into the house.
I think rendering her infertile would be a valid community service project
I dont know how to respond to your rave picture. I mean yeah, he's hot, but it just seems wrong to be like "Please tell me you fucked that guy with the pacifier!"
casual night just sitting in the kitchen at 2 am eating stale chips and hot sauce while my friends younger sister is cleaning all the blood off my body
At 12:16 am. We just got out of the truck and went behind it and fucked. With 3 people in the truck. On the side of the road. As cars drove by.
when I was walking home I wad so excited to see a cat on the sidewalk but it was really a traffic cone
Honestly, I want an afternoon of mild abuse, mixed with face fucking and general molestation that turns in love making, laughter and cinnamon toast crunch naked in bed.
I have no idea, I usually just project my awkwardness out like a mating call until it draws other awkward members of the opposite sex out from the bushes
Just had a small freak out because I couldn't get my bra unhooked and thought I was gonna be stuck in it forever.
Randomize
