did you wind up at some random place? and do you remember face planting into the fireplace?
idea:have a jello shot stand(opposed to lemonade stand) to raise money for spring break
He just made me a heart out of cocaine... i think i'm in love
and lets be real... who can blow a middle school class's sunday school teacher and keep a straight face ever again? NOBODY.
I'd say it's a shame and a disservice to the world that we can't stay drunken shitshows to infinity
you peed off the balcony at your sisters and asked someone below to catch it with a cup
Bryan's allergic to that cheap detergent, so he's been naked for three days. But we're all used to it now, so the party is still on.
You were naked too, so it cancels out. We're straight.
Is "head down ass up" an appropriate way to say good morning?
Your vagina felt like having sex with thanksgiving mashed potatoes. The best kind of mashed potatoes
If you don't turn up on horseback dressed like a highwayman I am not having sex with you today
McDonald's and a car nap. I feel kinda human
Wedding party came into the bar an hour ago. Mother of the bride is a stage five clinger. send help.
For a second I thought that you were becoming a decent person again. I am glad I was wrong.
I literally have a pirate chest of slutty clothing.
Randomize
