he whispered in my ear that he would be upstairs and i should come up. i stayed downstairs. he came back down and repeated to whisper in my ear. this happened about 5 times until he passed out.
I wish sober me loved running as much as drunk me...
also, did you notice that when he quoted your email he used MLA format?
It's been a long time since I felt this bad on a Monday... and for that, I thank you.
An image of us stuck like that like Pompeii comes to mind. A wonder for future anthropologists
Want to go home, so casually slip my underwear in his pocket. Never seen him grin so big and say goodbye to his friends.
I'm beer bonging chocolate fondue. That's how my Valentines Day is going.
On the way out the door to work grabbed the wine glass on the floor left for the ghost of Elijah and chugged it. PASSOVER.
So apparently someone caught him as he was falling. And carried him around the rest of the night.
it's not like I want to die, I just want life to stop for a little bit. how does that work?
you fail at everything in life besides blacking out
I am going to paint butt plugs like little Christmas trees and give them as gifts.
You could paint cock rings as wreaths.
This weekend I turned down sex to watch the Star Wars marathon... Is this growing up?
I just got wasted for $3.50. My life can't get any better.
Oh god, I forgot we had sex to Elton John
Randomize
