im orety awesome arent i? relly i know i am
I'm not working tomorrow. need to take advantage of the last opportunity for weeks of morning sex.
My Vagina smells like Nemo again.
Her vagina smelled like bad decisions
i crunched every chip from the dorito bag and poured it in the vase. never again will i have to deal with cool ranch fingers.
I thinking of taking all of the pics of his dick that he's sent me and making a calendar.
It's tuesday, which means cocktails followed by cocktales.
the campus cop used the word depravity in our citation.
I just found a plastic cup with panties inside of it. Let's play CSI.
I can already see the regret in her eyes. Amazing night. This city rules.
I approve. Last time I was there, I left E's room to get a drink of water. Found M sitting on the kitchen counter in his boxers hammered and eating a banana. He proceeded to feed me the rest of his banana then went to bed with the lights on. You two will be great.
I had to rub one out before the Shabbat dinner in case I find a nice Jewish girl to fuck me in the bathroom.
Your mother would be so proud
He came over last night and as soon as we started having sex Siri announced "you've arrived at your destination." I think it was some kinda sign
I mean if you can't appreciate a good looking dick then just get out.
He smells like sex and magic. I’m already naming our children
Maybe you should talk to him first
Randomize