I'm pretty sure that he just gave me the ginger disease
Maybe if i eat something filling like whole wheat pasta it will make me less hungry for things like dick
just saw a guy try to order booze in his coffee at 8 am.
the party we crashed was not a party. the party we crashed was jens grandads funeral.
the only reason why im excited to go home for break is to finally eat real fucking food and have normal bowel movements.
well he showed me a naked baby picture and i was right it hasn't grown
I just undressed him with my eyes. And gave him a 10 inch penis. I hope its true.
No, I didn't like him that much. But I took one for the team. And by the team I mean me and my vagina.
there are 5 pictures on my phone from last night, 4 are too blurry to recognize and the 5th is you dangling a twizzler over your mouth, naked.
He walked into my room in the middle of the night, whispered something about the patriot act, and took my tv.
Learned a valuable life lesson last night. It's titled "Tequila: Still A Bad Idea".
We shall study the pictures later and see if his penis is worth my time.
I woke up with a black eye, bruised knuckles, wearing women's clothing, in a house I did not recognize, next to a solid 9. Thank you for making 21 special.
What's the best way to tell someone that I accidentally wound up in a gay harem?
I just found three upside down bottles of grapejuice in a triangle around the air freshener above my toilet... I guess it was one of those nights
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