Really? You have stories that rival having a threesome with the two best friends of the guy your kinda seeing? Thats impressive.
never let anyone you met on skype borrow your car. lesson learned.
I told my boyfriend my favorite food was strawberry poptarts, now my email inbox is getting spammed with nude pics of him with his dick in a poptart box..
he put listerine on his cock to make the taste more "enjoyable"... i think hes a keeper.
I woke up naked in my own vomit. Not even in my bed. No one is happy.
So my girlfriend used a threesome to tell me she wanted to leave me for a girl... Not entirely sure how I should feel about that.
I'm still waiting for my blazer that I left at your apartment, you owe me a blowjob for every day from Thursday on that it's late.
It's a delicate game of how much porn can I look at without the other interns noticing.
We went to Denny's and he threatened to fight an entire high school track team by himself
You know you're a heffer when you discover chocolate frosting on your smoking apparatus
It's something I can't competently describe without making sex sounds.
I think it may be easier if I stay drunk/high til the wedding. You game?
thanks for passing me through your vagina 20 years ago today. your the best
We went to the midnight donut shop and you hopped the counter and told everyone to "Get the Fuck out of your Bar" but to also "Make yourselves at home".
Call me a snob but I'm not banging chicks with more fingers than teeth.
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