I was able to overlook the Affliction tee until he took it off and there was another tattooed on his body.
Was it at least attractive minus the Gargoyles or skulls... or whatever affliction is putting out these days?
Even a greek god couldn't pull it off. Told him I like Ed Hardy Better. Death Before Dishonor, baby. I'm sure it was a painful blow. hopefully he understands sarcasm.
coke and sex party at dan's
im watching greys anatomy with megan...
wha-pishhh
I feel like I'm one of those people who someone looks at and thinks "how did she get into this college"
I just took the soap out of the bathroom and hid it... this way I could see if she would say anything. you know, to see how clean she was
There is nothing wrong with wanting a slide attached to your staircase
In my defense it was my birthday and I really wanted to do it.
Why do I feel like the only way for this trip to end is alcohol poisoning?
You said that you were drinking out of a pan, and then went on to apologise to 'Jesus and all the other guys' for drinking on a Sunday.
Excellent idea. Nothing says "congrats for resurrecting yourself, Jesus" like Greygoose at noon!
I recommend we watch the Super Bowl together and have celebratory sex if we win. Good news is I don't have a team I dislike so were guaranteed a win.
Woke up to the UT campus police fishing my boxers out of the university pool, guess it was a good night.
You know that you're in a bad spot when the doctor puts you on 500mg of amoxicillin 4 times a day for ten days and puts refills on it...
I just masterbated to the Lets Get Ready To Rumble theme
He wrote his entire dissertation last night. I can only imagine the frightening amount of headway he would make if he ever did things sober.
Having Father’s Day on Pride weekend is always so awkward. “Hey dad just calling to say I love you.” While I’m navigating my way through a pop up pool at a bar riding a penis floatie. Happy Father’s Day.
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