she had a my little ponys comforter. i left when she went to the bathroom
it was funny though when you first woke up you pointed at my shoe and said i need my jacket and then put my shoe on your hand
I accidentally requested the ides of march off instead of st patricks day. Is this an omen? will alcohol be my brutus?
i'm ready for this baby to gtfo so i can get coked out.
last night we were having sex and i didn't care if i got off. i was just holding up my hand behind his head so i could look at my new ring. i think he knew.
i'm not a hellocoptur, but youer in a dorm ans im un a dorm
I don't think going to Relay for Life and painting our faces while everyone stares at us is a sufficent late night after the bars.
It's probably just the physical manifestation of slut karma. But i of course mean that in the kindest way possible because i love you and respect your choices
Hey Im running from the cops. hiding in a bush. when you're approaching the intersection honk the horn twice and I will come out.
This is irresponsible on your part, leaving me alone in a bar.
So hungover. I dropped my keys and leaning over seemed a terrible idea. Instead I took my shoe off in the middle of the street and use my toes to pick them up. Think I'm a genius.
Apparently, Lolla sends you an email every time you use your wristband to buy a beer.
21 new emails...yikes
Goddamn right, I may not survive the apocalypse, but my eyebrows fucking will.
FYI, his "son" is a Chihuahua.
whatever, tonight I’ll be getting my ass eaten by an aussie so we good
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