Thanks for last night it was amazing as always
What are you talking about
You've got to be kidding me
Actions speak louder than words. Her actions scream crazy.
If we keep treating our bodies like amusement parks we have another 10 years left at best.
He just walked up to be, grabbed my boob and said 'i think they have shrunk' i have no idea who he was.
I'm fucking an ugly guy. Don't come home.
well now I have to
He says he won't get serious until he screws an Asian and a virgin. I should just place an ad on Craig's List
Wanted: female 18-24 of Asian or partial Asian descent to fuck my ginger boyfriend. Must be willing and able to fake virginity. No emotional connection needed, just sex, just once. Further contact post sex not needed (or particularly desired)
I want a bunch of melted cheese. or a penis. or a penis covered in melted cheese
For breaking and entering. I think neighbor dan cared more about me puking in his backseat than the surprise of me waking up there
I'm sitting at dinner with my family looking over sexts. The thirst is far too real. They're talking about retail and I'm like haha, yes, you are all correct.
I mayyyyy have moaned a name that wasn't his
In case I die. I'm in ares truck with a bartender named Dave from chuys. JUST IN CASE. And let the people know my last words were suck my dick. My like literally.
SPICY FOODS AND BLOWJOBS DON'T MIX.
YOU SAID YOU'D TRY ANYTHING ONCE YOU LIAR
I literally heard an 'oh my god' when the shirtless Tongan appeared.
I'm the one who said we should take things slow. I'm also the one who forced him into the back on my car so we could have sex.
The only thing I remember about us having sex is yelling at him to choke me.
Randomize
