he asked me to smell his eyeballs.
Just looking for some anal play. An attempting to read atonement. The highbrow/lowbrow divide is striking.
This is ridiculous. It's like playing possible STD Clue, and I don't want to be the winner.
There's a very real possibility that I'll wake up in your uncle's driveway.
Hey since its national brother week is that eiffel tower option with your girlfriend still on the table?
What is a foreign vacation of stupidity without some fake names?
Bring one of those heart stabber things in case you go into shock. I'll jab you.
You raged at the rock climbing place for not selling beer and then just said "fuck it" and pulled out a flask.
The guys are trying to figure out my orientation....think theyve settled on "drunksexual"
I have no idea what those words in that order meant, but if you go to Florida send me pics of strippers
Nothing like drunkenly buying a pregnancy test at 8 am to get out and realize your nip was out the whole time.
the conference was great. we had to hide the acid in a planter in front of the department of agriculture though
If waking up at 6 50 pm every day and getting invited to go have sex as you wake up is what alcoholism is like I can get use to this.
My potted cactus died. I am literally less nurturing than the desert.
What were you even doing out there at 2 a.m.?
Look, i had a gallon of lemonade, a pack of smokes and a Darth Vader voice changer. What did you EXPECT me to do?
Randomize