Yeah, we realized keeping you in a cage wasn't beneficial to us
when im bored during the day i often think, what do people who dont get high do with their day.. i came to the conlcusion that everyone must be getting high
I would like to meet someone who actually lost their virginity in a candle filled room
oh hey just found a glowstick in my tits. fuck yes new years eve
"fuck a duck" is spelled out in chinese food on my counter... im kind of nervous to search the rest of my house......
I think the fact that my first kiss is now in a porno says a lot about why my life is the way it is
He was waring a speedo fashioned out of american flag bandanas and when he got hard he said "you're such a patriot...raising the american flag like that"
The timing couldn't have been better if I planned it. His mom walked away, I vomited in their mulch, and then his mom came back and offered me bread.
But for future reference, it might help your game if you don't tell the girl you're trying to get on your dick that she's "not the worst thing you've ever seen"
You turned to me, winked, whispered "man the harpoons" and walked out with the fat chick
I'm gonna eat you out with that hat on so it looks like beaker's doing it. And I'm gonna go "memememememe"
We have a lot of substance abuse to do tomorrow its sleep time
Like I respect him so much I would suck his dick
In a very non respectful way
The car smells like weed is an understatement.
im gonna miss him. and by him, i mean his dick
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