all I know is if I don't watch spice world right now there will be a firefight.
Take xtc, wait 20 minutes and then take a shower. Trust me.
True love is taking a shit with the one you love in the bathroom with you.
he was like Britney Spears in bed.. a little chubby and too medicated to perform.
He took out the lube and started calling it fuck fluid
I figured that I'd start organizing the places ive given head. I'll add treehouse right after bandroom
I peed glitter this morning and had a beard drawn on my face with eyeliner. Last time I do shots with gay Dan.
It's 6 am, I'm drunk, and celebrating the end of finals.Go ahead and ask me where I am...if you guessed a McDonald's playpen then you are correct. Badabababa I'm loving it
Something about being drunk at 1pm chasing seagulls on the beach while it's raining is very calming
I'm ashamed and embarrassed. Unless we get drunk and have random sex with people we will never see again we might lose ourselves.
I have invented a new game to play on campus. It's called "Mormons or Pledges?" It's fantastic.
Our Tuesday night drunk Irish step dancing was on point tonight.
I really have to stop going to the movies high. Spending $10 to not know what the fuck is going on is starting to get pricey.
My Dicks been hard all day. Poor guy isn't used to vacation being over
There's nothing classy about a pregnant girl at a frat party...remember that.
Randomize
